Time to Reflect
Last week I celebrated by 52nd birthday (I’m not someone who shies away from sharing my age – I proudly stand in the truth that I have grown with each passing year, and have earned “bragging rights” of sorts, if you will). And every year around my birthday I give myself permission to sit in a reflective space. It’s a chance for me to slow down, take stock, evaluate, and (if necessary) re-align with the people, experiences and things that matter to me.
These days as I face the inevitability of my own mortality (not for any particular reason, other than the fact that however you slice it, I’m in the last half of my life, for sure – statistically I’m not likely to make it past 100, you know?), my reflections tend to be about who I am, how I show up, what impact I’ve had, am having and want to ultimately have had as part of my legacy. It occurs to me that sharing a few of these learnings may be of value to you. So, in no particular order, here are some lessons:
Growth and evolution (in the mental, emotional and spiritual sense) are necessary to a life well-lived. No matter how long I have lived or how much I have learned, there’s always more for me to learn – if I let myself.
Letting myself continue to grow is an act of courage and a gift to myself as well as those with whom I interact. Stagnating doesn’t serve anyone.
The saying that “people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime” is one worth remembering, especially when relationship dynamics shift. Discerning the longevity and usefulness of a particular relationship helps everyone to live life fully and meaningfully.
Growing up doesn’t mean having to let go of childlike joy, at least not for me. Part of what serves me well is being able to move through life with the childlike exuberance of a toddler. The curiousity, the wonder, the energetic equivalent of skipping through mud-puddles, you know? Some might frown upon my supposed “immaturity” – I maintain that there’s something magical about being able to be “silly” once in a while.
Sometimes, life can just feel hard, and that’s okay.
More than one thing can be true at the same time. For example, life can be hard and still have experiences of ease; I can be sad in one area of my life and quite content in others. I’m a complex human, which means that I have complex experiences.
Self-care is not the same as selfishness. In fact, self-care is what allows me to be of service to others.
Pain isn’t something to avoid; sometimes I actually need to let myself experience pain in order to grow into whatever is next for me. Growing pains, both physical and emotional, are a real and necessary part of life.
Music soothes the soul.
There’s something absolutely soul-enriching about walking through grass in bare feet.
Everybody has a unique combination of passion, purpose and presence. When you find your combination of these 3 things, you find what feeds your soul.
ALL emotions are meant to be felt; no emotions are bad.
Sometimes the very best thing you can do – for yourself as well as for others – is just be present. No problem-solving, no checking off of lists, no frantic running around – just be.
I know there’s more I could share. For now, this list feels like enough. My longing for each of us as I embark on another trip around the sun is that we live our lives meaningfully, we make space for stillness and we stay connected to one another. Here’s to our ongoing growth, learning and evolution as individuals and as a collective.