The Secret to Making Guilt-Free Choices
Guilt.
As human beings, guilt is a quality that seems to go hand-in-hand with decision-making. We feel it in the never-ending pull between work and home, between project X and project Y, between self-care and social demands, between taking a stand and standing aside. The existence of all of these seeming dichotomies virtually ensures that no matter what you choose, guilt will ensue.
Here’s what I want you to know: it doesn’t have to be this way.
Guilt is a quality that rears its head when you are uncertain of your choice and therefore less than 100% committed to it. Guilt masquerades as being rooted in a feeling of conflict, but the truth of the matter is that it’s rooted in lack of commitment. When you are fully committed to a choice, whatever that choice may be, guilt dissipates.
So, how do you turn up the dial on your commitment? As with so much of what I share, clarity about what you value is the key. When you understand your values, you can make your choices based on those values with 100% commitment. In other words, whatever decision you make, once you make it, throw yourself “all in”.
Here’s an example to help illustrate the point: many professionals often feel the conflicting pull between home life and professional life. Your child is sick at home and you have a budget meeting at work. There’s a sense that you’re needed in both places, right?
So, ask yourself: what do I truly value here? What matters in the big picture? Release all judgment and notice your true answer. Now, make your choice accordingly. Whatever you choose – whether it’s to go to the meeting or to stay home with your child, get 100% behind your decision. If you choose to go to the meeting, allow yourself to be fully present in that forum, knowing that you’ve made a values-based choice. Similarly, if you decide to stay home with your child and reschedule the meeting, be 100% with your child, and forego any and all things budget-related for the time being.
Bottom-line: guilt need not be part of your professional experience. The secret to minimizing guilt is to maximize your commitment. Ensure that your choices are solidly rooted in your values. Then get behind those choices with 100% commitment. Learn to live with an “all-in” energy, and notice your experience of guilt become a thing of the past.