Redefining Who You Are in Service of Becoming More
Confession: I am a facebook junkie. And part of what feeds my habit, is seeing different facebook quotes and memes. Every so often I come across one that I consider “frame-worthy”. Several years ago I came across one that I immediately framed, and it has hung in a place of honour in my office ever since. The quote by Lao Tzu, which is featured in this ezine’s “quote to ponder” simply says: “When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be”.
Before I expound upon the meaning of this quote and why I think it matters, consider this question: who are you? What is your defining quality? What do you stand for?
In this enlightened age, you are challenged to know yourself, to be true to who you are in all that you do. Indeed, this is a creed by which I myself strive to live, a creed of authenticity. Many learned folks have told us that knowing who we are is essential to living a life of integrity.
And yet, there’s a pitfall.
When you are so certain about who you are, you limit your capacity to be more. You see, as a human being you are capable of EVERYTHING (yes, everything). You may not like doing everything; and there may be things you don’t do very well. But there really isn’t anything that you cannot do or at least attempt to do; there is no quality that you cannot be. Everyone is capable of doing great things, not-so-great things, being kind, being mean, telling the truth, lying, pushing boundaries – you get the idea.
While you might subscribe to certain belief systems and certain ideas of who you are and who you want to be, the fact is there is opportunity that opens up for you outside of “who you are.” In other words, there’s something to be said for letting go of “this is who I am” and standing in the question of “who else am I?” When you do this, you allow yourself to stretch – to stretch your capacity, your capabilities, your opportunities.
When you ask yourself, “who ELSE am I?” you might be surprised by what you unearth. It might be a little frightening to entertain the possibility that you are, in fact, more than your professional title; or more than the role you hold in relationship to others; or capable of skills that you haven’t realized were in your wheelhouse. And yet, holding the question of “what else” as it relates to who you are can, in fact, be liberating. It can be possibility-filled. It can be life-enhancing.
Bottom-line: knowing who you are is a good thing. And, letting go of who you are in service of who you might be is an even better thing. Learn to dance with both. And watch yourself become ALL of who you truly are.