The Secret to Truly Effective Communication
Recently, I have found myself coaching groups and teams in addition to my usual cohort of individuals. I love the range of leadership configurations that is currently on my roster – different ways in which I get to work with leaders at all levels, as it were. This week, I have noticed a particular topic emerging across these configurations; and if I’m really honest, it’s a topic that rears its head at some point in all of my work with leaders and their teams.
Communication.
No matter the individual, no matter the leader, no matter the team, the question of how to communicate effectively is bound to be asked.
In response – especially if I’m in facilitation mode, versus coaching mode – we engage in training around modes of communication, styles of communication, bridging gaps in communication. I’m sure you know the common nuts and bolts. Eventually we arrive at what I believe is the secret sauce in communication. It often lands with a sense of “well, of course, that matters” followed by the question “wait, am I doing that?”
Before I share with you what the secret sauce is, let me back up for a moment and share that often, communication is sent into the world simply as information. Mass emails, press releases, short memos, a quick text or even a voice exchange; the express purpose of such communication is generally seen as getting the word out, whatever that word might be. Which is fine; after all, communication is all about conveying a message, right? Or is there more?
Um, yes. There is definitely more to communication than just “downloading information”. In fact, the hallmark of effective communication is CONNECTION. And I would actually take it a step further and dare to say that one of the purposes of communication is to connect; connection is not simply a desirable by-product.
What is connection?
Connection is what is created when there is some sort of commonality between those involved in a communication exchange. Connection can look like:
Shared purpose
Shared vision
Common demographic
Common background
Sense of team
Common language
In a nutshell, connection happens when folks feel aligned somehow.
Sometimes the connection is pre-existing. Sometimes, the connection has to be built. No matter what, however, if you don’t establish a sense of connection – at the very least during the communication exchange, if not before – your communication will be less than effective. Why? Because as humans, we want more than mere information. At our core, by virtue of our humanity, we want to feel connected. In a world that is filled with information blurbs, the way to stand out – the way to enhance your communication so that it is, indeed, effective, is to connct.
So, the next time you have a message to send – whether to your team, your family, your friends, or just out into the world – ask yourself: do you have some sort of connection established with your intended audience? If not, how might you connect? And how would your message be enhanced by such connection?
If you have a sense that your communication efforts are floundering in any way, it’s very likely that you’re overlooking the need for connection. So start there; establish some connection and then deliver your message. When you build connection, effective communication happens almost effortlessly.