Stellar Coaching + Consulting

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Leadership & Letting Go

Anyone who’s ever met me, or heard me speak, or read my ezine for some time likely knows that “surrender” is a big value of mine.  Like, BIG.  It’s something that I hold dear because I know, on a cellular level, even when my brain wants to disagree, that surrender is the ultimate key to success. 

Which may sound bizarre, I know, but hear me out.

Surrender is one of those concepts that’s very often misunderstood.  It’s generally equated with giving up, abandoning.  But that’s not actually correct. 

Instead, surrender is about understanding that as a human being you actually can’t do all that you want to do.  You cannot have all that you want to have. 

At least not on your own.

Historically, different people and groups have tried to point us in the direction of this truth by sharing religious beliefs, establishing rituals that are anchored in faith and trust.  But the surrender I’m talking about goes way beyond ritual and religion.

Surrender is about understanding that once you’ve done all that you’re capable of, once you’ve created a plan, worked a plan, implemented a plan and given it your all, there is still more to give.  And that more is given from outside of yourself. 

So, you’ve got to let it go.  That’s right.  Let. It. Go.

I realize that this might seem just a little “out there” compared to the usual, practical, anchored material I send out.  I understand that.  And yet I also know that the reason it might seem “out there” is only because you haven’t yet allowed yourself to experience the power of such surrender.  It’s not necessarily an easy thing to do.

Surrender as a concept seems easy enough to understand.  But in the context of leadership, of setting and achieving goals and objectives, surrendering seems to fly in the face of taking responsibility, doesn’t it?  I mean, if you’re going to actively make a vision become reality, then don’t you have to keep at it – whatever ‘it’ is – until your objective is achieved? 

My answer is yes… and no.  

Your job is absolutely, as aforesaid, to do all that you can.  And then, after you’ve done all that, to let go of your attachment to your goal, understand that what you see or want to see is only part of the big picture and surrender the process over to the powers that be – whether you consider that to be God, the universe, your higher power or whatever.  There is a force outside of you that is activated once you do your part; your job is to do your part and then allow that force to do its part.  How do you do this?  Here are a few steps:

  • Be clear on what you’re wanting.  Paint a mental picture, if you will.
  • Take action, as much as you can.  Be deliberate and focused.
  • Allow for inspiration; don’t bury your head in the sand or be so blinded that you can’t see when a detour might be what’s needed.
  • Set your timeline, then allow things to unfold.  Dance with time, knowing that while you might think something has to happen right here, right now, this way, there may be a bigger stage being set, for something even better.
  • Remember that you can only see part of the picture and remind yourself that what you see isn’t all that there is.

Bottom-line:  when it comes to achieving your goals, sitting around and wishing is not enough.  Knowing what your goals are isn’t enough.  Being crystal clear about your vision isn’t enough.  And doing all that you can do and relying on your own self isn’t enough.  At some point, you’ve got to surrender and allow.  While this isn’t always easy to do, rest assured, the payoff is well worth it.

Tracy Harvie