Yes, Strong Leaders Can Be Vulnerable

For some reason, the issue of vulnerability is on my mind today.  Not sure why.  And not sure it really matters.  I’m just aware that I’ve been contemplating vulnerability for a bit today, wondering what it means, and what role it has in the realm of effective leadership.

You see, one of the things I witness fairly regularly in my work (given that I work with women leaders) is a trend towards “being strong” — or at least acting strong — in the face of whatever comes your way.  There seems to be an idea floating around that effective leaders are strong.  Period.  And for the most part, I can totally buy into this idea.  Effective leaders ARE strong.  That being said, I don’t believe that this strength needs to come at the expense of vulnerability.

When I think of effective leaders, leaders who get the job done, who command respect and draw people into their cause, there’s definitely a confidence and conviction that can be interpreted as strength.  I do believe, however, that these same strong leaders — the effective ones — also know how to allow their vulnerability to come through.  Vulnerability takes the form of admitting to mistakes, acknowledging that you don’t have all the answers, being willing to rely on your team, surrounding yourself with people who have capabilities which you don’t.  And sometimes, vulnerability means allowing your emotions to be visible to the outside world, including sadness and fear.

Why do I feel the need to write about this today?  Because I think the notion that vulnerability is contrary to effective leadership is false.  Moreover, I think this mistaken notion sets otherwise effective and powerful leaders up for failure.  Not just one-time, oops-I-made-a-mistake failure, but gone-for-all-time failure — the kind of failure whereby leaders lose followers and therefore lose their capacity to lead.  My sense is that until and unless an otherwise effective leader is willing to be vulnerable — to let his or her supposed “weakness” come through from time to time, people will actually find other leaders.

While having a strong, heroic, invincible leader works for a time, at some point people want to see your humanity.  In other words, effective leaders have got to be willing to let their emotions come forward, their mistakes be made known, so that they can then be seen to rise above that.

Bottom-line:  to be a truly effective leader, you’ve got to be a whole human package.  Strength is good.  Vulnerability is good.  And both together is great.  Vulnerable strength, and strong vulnerability — I think these are at least two of the characteristics of effective leaders.

A Place of Wonder

So, I’m  not yet really sure what this blog post is going to be about.  I just know that I’ve made a commitment to myself to write in this blog at least three times a week, and last week got away from me — I think I only managed one post.  Not beating myself up over it — and I’m aware that I don’t want this week to be a repeat.  So, here I am, diving in.

Woke up this morning setting the intention of productivity, to-do-lists done, meetings, scheduled, clients well-served, etc;.  I say “etc;” only because my daily intentions are often a variation of this.  Which could be construed as boring.  Today, though, had the added flavour of being in a state of wonder.  As in “I wonder what will show up today?”  Today, when I’ve coached my clients, I’ve come from wonder about where our coaching will go.  When I’ve tweeted, I’ve wondered about who might respond, or what might get provoked for followers.  When the thunder-storm began, I took myself to the place of wondering — how long would it last, would I walk the dog in the rain, would the power go out, would the children be scared?

And then, there’s been just an overall sense of wonder — what will the day hold?  What seed will get planted today that will bear fruit later?  What fruit will show itself today, from some seed that I planted earlier?  What little surprise will the universe have for me — and will I see it for what it is?

I guess I’ve got a sense that wonder serves leadership in a big way.  I think we’ve got a notion in our world that leadership requires conviction, and that conviction is different somehow from wonder.  I guess I’m sort of hanging out in a space today of thinking that wonder and conviction actually go together more strongly than might be apparent at first glance.  I think wonder fuels conviction, or at least strengthens it in some way.  Because standing in wonder facilitates learning, which can enhance conviction.  That’s where I’m at today.

Bottom-line for me, effective leadership, leadership that serves humanity, and even leadership that serves on a smaller scale requires one to stand in wonder, at least for a small segment of time.  What reveals itself to you, when you stand in wonder?