Whatever Will Come, Will Come…

Yes, I know.  The traditional saying is “whatever will be, will be.”  However, my son has just finished reading the Harry Potter series of books — one of my all time favourites, by the way — and this morning I asked him what his favourite quote was.  He didn’t have to think long before he quoted Hagrid and said, “Whatever will come, will come.  And we’ll have to meet it when it does.”

Now, while I realize that the words were not his — he was quoting, after all — I was awestruck at his ability to pull what seems like an essential life-learning from the series, at such a young age.  Essentially, this quote speaks to what so many struggle with on a daily basis:  the ability to stay right here, right now, not worrying about what might happen, and instead trying to plan for every eventuality, engaging in a host of unnecessary worry as a result. Honouring the quote of “whatever will come, will come” seems like such a fantastic reminder of the approach required to move through life with ease.

As I reflect on how this perspective serves leadership, it occurs to me that leaders must strive to avoid getting caught in the “perpetual planning” trap.  There’s a way in which leadership — which requires one to be forward-thinking — requires one to plan ahead.  A leader must contemplate the future, try to anticipate what might happen and brainstorm possible contingency plans and options.  It’s the nature of the beast, I get it.  And yet, if a leader is not careful, he or she can get so caught up in planning and miss what’s going on right here, right now.  And this doesn’t serve either.

Bottom-line:  effective leaders balance the ability to plan with the ability to stay fully grounded and present in this moment.  They balance their ability to vision with the ability to see what’s right in front of them.  They understand that, try as they will, all the planning in the world simply cannot prepare them for every eventuality.  And when it comes right down to it, effective leaders know how to dance with whatever comes their way, even without planning.  Because, whatever will come, will come — that’s all there is to it.

Working Through a Migraine

Okay, I’m not really sure if it’s a migraine or not.  What I do know is that it’s a wicked headache — settling just behind my right eye.  The intensity of it ebbs and flows, so that in some moments I feel able to plow ahead with what needs to be done, and in others I just want to crawl into bed.  Truthfully, my original thought this morning was that I would get the kids set for the day, send them off to school and then snuggle back up under the covers.  Instead, I actually ended up having quite a productive morning, all the while being absolutely aware of the throbbing, sharp sensation behind my eye.

Granted, I did cancel one meeting that would have required me to drive; getting behind the wheel seemed like an unsafe choice.  Typing with my eyes closed I can do; driving with my eyes closed, not so much.  But other than canceling that meeting, I got a lot accomplished.  I submitted a speaker application for an upcoming conference (which felt akin to expanding my comfort zone — the conference is outside my usual geographic locale); I signed another executive client; I forwarded foundation session packages to new clients; I completed required billing; I did some marketing email.  All in all, surprisingly productive.

So what’s my learning out of all this?  I guess it’s something along the lines of “I can only do what I can do in any given moment, and what I can do is actually more than I might think” — something like that.  Because when I awoke this morning, I didn’t anticipate getting anything done.  And now, half-way through my workday, I’ve actually accomplished a fair bit — things are actually crossed off my to-do list, and it’s only Monday, and I’ve had this headache.  I know what the learning is; it’s the Wayne Dyer quote from this morning — “Be in the now. See how doing the Tao at this moment brings  big results by paradoxically staying small and simple.”  That’s the learning; small, simple and now is the stuff that matters.  Especially when you’ve got a migraine.

Excuse Me, But Do I Know You?

I’m sitting here this morning, typing this blog post and finding myself wondering about something that, admittedly, I’ve wondered about a fair bit in the last few months.  In really general terms, the topic which has my mind so preoccupied much of the time (although not all of the time) is that of technology and it’s ever-evolving role in our world.  On the surface, the emergence of various technological tools and mediums seems like progress; today, you can easily correspond and connect with someone on the other side of the world in a matter of seconds, using various internet tools such as skype, twitter or just standard email.  Just a few decades ago, such instant connection was impossible.  Provided the basic technology is present, no matter where you are in 2010, you are pretty much guaranteed to be able to connect with the outside world.   Which means — or at least seems to mean — that we are a highly connected world.  But this is where I question what others might find logical.

You see, while it looks like we have the means to be connected in ways never-before possible, what I know for sure is that this technologically-based way of connecting has a superficiality about it.  When your only means of interacting with the outside world is through typing, texting or even chatting via phone, as a human being you are missing the very important — and I would argue essential — element of physical connection.  Being able to see another person, experience their energy first-hand, give them a hug, shake their hand — these are not mere enhancements to communication and the human experience.  Instead, they are integral components of said experience.

Now, I know, many of you would argue that you’re still in physical contact with some of the world at large.  Furthermore, new technological advances are allowing you and I to interact in an immediate way with populations that would never have been possible even 30 years ago.  I get it.  My concern — or at least my question — however, is to what degree is this new technology impacting real human relationships?  What I witness out there in the world is that techno-based communication isn’t limited to work-exchanges.  Instead, texting, emailing, etc; are equally present in personal relationships.  So what arises for me is the following curiousity:  when you’ve spent the better part of your day involved in text and email exchanges with someone, is that level of connection as meaningful as even an hour’s worth of face-to-face interaction?

I guess what it comes down to for me is this:  I see us living in a world where the illusion of being perpetually connected has people — you, me, the neighbors — ignoring some of the essentials of the human connecting experience.  Handshakes, smiles (real, not those expressed with punctuation), hugs, physical presence are all experiences that augment our human connection with one another.  My invitation and request of all of us is that we challenge ourselves to stay physically connected, at least with a core group of people.  And furthermore, it’s my belief that such connective exchanges be present on a daily basis.  Otherwise, despite the number of texts and emails you receive, I would suggest that you’re actually moving into an isolated existence, the exact opposite of a truly connected one.

The Point of Power is Right Now

You know, this is something I’ve been aware of for a while now…and yet, it still catches me off guard from time-to-time.  It’s as though I’ve spent so many years either analyzing the past or trying to manipulate the future, that the business of staying right here in the present moment can be more than a little challenging.  Let’s face it; for me it can be down-right paralyzing!

I believe I first read this phrase, “the point of power is right now”, in one of Louise Hay’s books.  But I’ve since been confronted by variations on this theme wherever I turn.  A number of recent “daily affirmations” have pointed to this universal truth; several authors which I’m currently reading have expounded upon this.  And I guess what I’m coming to realize is that there really is no way around it — no matter what I want, no matter what I long for, no matter what I’m trying to change in my life, I’ve got to do it from present-moment energy.  Looking backward keeps me stuck, and fast-forward motion has me spin my wheels.

One of the questions that arises for me out of all of this, however, is how to blend the past and future so that I can truly leverage the power of the present.  I mean, I know that I can learn from past experience.  And I know that to some degree  I have to know what I’m heading towards in the future.  So how do I do these two things, without losing my toehold on the present moment?  These are the questions I’m dancing with now.  And even as I write them, I have an energetic sense that the answer lies in the here and now.  Go figure.

I guess the bottom-line is this:  peace, contentment, happiness, joy — all of this stuff is to be found in this moment.  So, ultimately, if those are the things I’m wanting, then right here right now is where I’ve got to hang out.  I’m gonna give it a try.

When You Can’t See What’s Ahead

A couple of years ago, I was driving with my family on our first-ever March Break trip to Disneyworld.  The excitement in the vehicle as we drove on that first night — a 4 hour stretch, just to say we were on our way — was palpable.  My husband was the only one of us who had ever been to Disneyworld, and even he was tingling with the anticipation of reliving the magic with all of us.

That first night we stopped at a hotel, enjoyed a relaxing evening complete with popcorn and a bit of TV before going to bed.  When we awoke the next morning, we were in the midst of a major (and I mean MAJOR) snowstorm.  Now, for us, being from Canada and specifically southwestern ontario, snowstorms aren’t necessarily a huge deal, so we just ate our breakfast, climbed in the van and headed on our way.  Well, we weren’t on the road for more than 30 minutes before we were all feeling more than a little nervous, and that’s putting it mildly.  There was a ton (more or less) of snow on the roads, plows hadn’t been by in who knows how long, and every few meters there was another vehicle in the ditch.  The windshield wipers were freezing and becoming so snow-covered that there was no way of knowing what was ahead.  The only thing we could see was what was right in front of us — and the screen of our GPS.  And the only thing we knew for sure, was that at some point, if we kept driving, we would be out of the storm.  So, white-knuckled, my husband kept his hands on the wheel, his foot on the brake, and his eyes on both the road and the GPS.  By doing this and staying calm,he  managed to get us safely through the storm and onto clear roads (granted it was a good 2 1/2 hours later till we were on clear roads, but clear they were).  My job in all of this was to ensure that the children stayed calm and occupied — so out came my bag of activities, the in-car movies, and my own calm-factor (albeit with perspiration on my forehead).

Why am I telling you all of this?  Well, this morning it occurred to me that life can, at times, feel exactly like that drive to Disneyworld.  There are times where the storm clouds of life come in and you cannot see what lies ahead, no matter how hard you try. All you know for sure is that if you keep moving forward, the clouds will clear and all will be fine in the end.  In those circumstances, the key really is to stay grounded in the here and now, taking one step at a time, and re-adjusting as necessary.  Granted, this can be challenging in the heat of the moment.  You may well want to “take the nearest exit” as it were, crawl back into bed and try to out-wait the storm.  What I know for sure, however, is that in most cases, simply standing in the knowledge that the storm will pass, and taking whatever small steps you can to move forward in the meantime, is actually more productive.

Bottom-line:  anyway you look at it, keeping your focus in the present is the option that serves best.  Always.  And especially when life feels cloudy.

When You Lose Momentum

It’s funny; I don’t think I’ve ever really been in this position before.  That is to say, I don’t think I’ve ever really “lost” momentum.  I think there have been times where I’ve slowed down, where I’ve felt myself losing momentum, but I’ve never actually lost it entirely.  Well, I guess there’s a first time for everything.  Because at this point, I have definitely LOST momentum.  It’s gone.  Kaput. Fizzled out.  And it feels wierd!

Years ago, in highschool physics class, I remember learning some law that says an object in motion likes to stay in motion, unless it is stopped.  This much I remember.  And this is the way I’m feeling right now.  Like everything has ground to a halt.  It’s all stopped.  What I don’t remember is how that same object can get started again.  I’m actually sitting here, in this space of my life, having lost momentum completely, and wondering “how do I get it back?”  “Where do I start?”

The answer that keeps coming up is “just take one step — any step.”  Which seems to make sense.  What I’m finding most intriguing, however, is how hard it is to take a step, any step.  It actually takes a LOT of effort (or at least it is for me).  And this is really frustrating.

All this being said, I must state that writing this blog post is — in and of itself — a step for me.  It is one thing off of my weekly task list.  From here I will send some email correspondence.  Then I will work on polishing my survey for interested participants.  Slowly but surely, i will keep taking steps.   And what I know for sure is that by taking one step at a time, I will build momentum and get my rhythm back.  The challenge for me right now is to stay in the “one step at a time” moment, until I get to the rhythmic momentum moment.  And I will get there.  One step at a time.