Go Ahead, Get It Wrong (And Then Get It Right!)

One of the things that has been making itself crystal clear in every cell of my being over the last couple of weeks is the vision for what I’m creating in the world.  Admittedly, not all of it is crystal clear; in fact, much of it is downright blurry.  But it’s coming into focus, and everyday brings me another piece of the puzzle (sometimes I get a piece of the piece, but it’s still coming together — that’s the point).

As I give myself permission to receive these bits of insight, and as I sit with what’s clear and what isn’t, there are two questions that I hold that seem to support the process.  Both are questions that I encountered when I took CTI’s leadership program.  The first involves me filling in the blank:  “I was born at this time in history to  ______________”.  As if that doesn’t give one pause for thought.  Sheesh.  And then there’s the, “what is your purpose as a leader?” question.  Both of these result in slightly different articulations of the same phrase. And, they’re filled with what I believe my whole coaching practice and purpose are about.  Let me see if I can fill you in.

For me, what is becoming clearer, even 2 years out from my leadership journey, is that I’m meant to infuse the world — the small world around me and by extension the world at large — with a sense of ease. Now, whenever I articulate this, even if just to myself, I am overcome with a sense of overwhelm.  Ironic, isn’t it?  Given that I’m about “ease”? It’s like I get inundated with a whack of voices saying, “you’re full of it”, “no way can life be filled with ease” and other similar phrases.  All of a sudden, my mission feels daunting, never mind challenging.

But here’s what I’m coming to realize.  The overwhelm doesn’t actually come from the supposed enormity of my challenge.  Instead, it comes from a fear that I might not succeed.  That I might be wrong.  Or, that I’m right but I’ll somehow get it wrong.  That I’ll fail.  That I’ll leave this earth without having actually modeled what I think ease is.  With this in mind, here’s what I’m challenging myself to do — to go ahead and get it wrong.  That’s right; because what I know is that so long as I risk getting it wrong, I actually stand a chance of getting it right.  Every time I make an error, I get that out of the way and realign myself so that I eventually get it right.

And here’s the other thing I’m learning afresh.  As I get clearer and clearer on my vision, I also get clearer and clearer on my markers for success.  And my markers really are my markers.  My indicators of ease, and my sharing of these indicators, are based on my understanding.  In other words, it’s time for me to stop grappling with the angst of other people who don’t get what I’m up to, start putting myself out there, and then, glory be, I know I’ll get it right.

So here’s the bottom-line, the lesson for you:  whatever it is that you’re here to do, for whatever reason that you’re on the planet right here, right now, get clear on that, then keep putting yourself out there, dealing with others’ misperceptions, getting it wrong and then getting it right.  To fulfill your leadership purpose, you’ve got to get it wrong at some point.  Only then will you get it right.

Derailed or Inspired: What’s Your Response to Failure?

Failure.  Whether it’s of grand proportions or small-scale, failure happens to all of us at some time or another.  And generally speaking, failure is not the outcome we’re aiming for whenever we engage in a venture, whatever it may be.  Whether we’re aiming for it or not, however, failure is generally part of the game.  Many of the most sucessful people on the planet will tell you that in order to achieve their successes, they had to travel a path marked with numerous failures.  The key to their success — as well as to yours — lies in their response to those failures.  Which leads me to get really curious:  how do I respond to failure?  And how do you?

For many people, failure is the impetus for becoming derailed.  I’m sure you’ve had at least one time where you’ve allowed this to be your response.  You work really hard for some particular aim, it turns out to elude you, and you give up on the venture altogether.  Not uncommon — and certainly not something I’m wanting to judge you for.  What I do want to do, however, is invite you to ask yourself, how might you allow that same failure to inspire you rather than derail you?  Even if it doesn’t inspire you immediately, what if you could take time to be derailed, and then move into the place of being inspired?  What would be possible then?

I’m willing to bet that the aforementioned “succesful people” all have felt derailed at one point or another.  I assert that what moved them forward to eventual success is the fact that theymoved from derailed to inspired at some point.  They took a look at “what went wrong” and tried to find what could “go right”.  Here’s what I want you to consider:  failure is not something to be ashamed of, or even something to avoid.  There is huge opportunity in failure, if you’re willing to find it.  Within that opportunity lies inspiration to keep moving forward.  And that inspiration, when you allow yourself to see it, is what will move you to your eventual success.