When the Answer Eludes

As a coach, one of the fundamental premises upon which I operate is that as human beings, we all have our own answers.  In other words, no matter the question, you know the answer — sometimes you just need to dig a little to unearth it.  That is the premise.  One of the things I’m encountering this week, however, is the feeling of “not knowing” — which is disconcerting given my fundamental premise.  I mean, if I have my own answers, how come I can’t find them?  It’s a bizarre scenario to be in, let me tell you.

What I’m realizing is that sometimes, answers aren’t all that accessible.  For whatever reason, they’re buried deep.  They’re camouflaged.  They’re silent.  So what are you to do?  Particularly as a leader, the one who’s supposed to  have the answers, to be all-knowing, what do you do when the answer is elusive?  Well, here are 5 strategies to implement; at the very least, they’ll be a starting point.  And, at their most successful, they’ll open the solution floodgates:

1. Ask for help.  Enlist the support of a colleague or mentor.  Sometimes, an outsider will be able to see what you’re missing.
2. Move around.  Get your blood flowing, move your body and watch your mental processes start to move as well.  Answers can start to flow from there.
3. Change perspective.  If you’re sitting down, stand up.  Facing the wall?  Move to the window.  A fresh perspective can illuminate answers previously hidden from view.
4. Let it go — the question that is.  Stop thinking about the problem at hand, put it aside and come back to it later.  Sometimes, letting go of a question allows the answer to emerge with ease when you least expect it.
5. Make it into a game.  Gather a few cohorts, present the problem at hand and have fun discovering answers.  Switching the “problem” into a game changes the energy — and oftentimes, things are so much easier when the energy is fun.

Bottom-line:  even leaders come up against situations in which the answers are elusive.  You simply can’t know it all, all the time.  Or perhaps, more accurately, you can’t access it all, all the time.  In those moments, there are strategies to try.  And when you do, the answers will flow.

When do you find it hard to access answers?  When does the world seem a little foggy to you?  And how do you cope?  Would love to hear your thoughts.  Feel free to leave them here or email me at info@stellarcc.com.

Your Mission, If You Choose to Accept It…

…is to be in silence for at least an hour.  Seriously.  While this may seem like a fairly simple task, let me assure you that the world in which we live makes this task anything but simple.  You see, we live in a world of distractions — or at least, a world of so many things to attract our focus, that silence inevitably loses out.  And this is a shame because so many of the answers we seek can be found in that very silence.

A couple of years ago, when I participated in a leadership training program, I was required to engage in 24 hours of silence.  At first, my reaction was “yippee — time to catch up on my reading and journal writing.” Then we were told that the silence was actually all-encompassing — no reading, no writing, no talking.  We could communicate with others — but not verbally.  The challenge was to truly BE with ourselves and the silence.  We were not allowed to distract ourselves with other activities (except those that were facilitated as part of our learning).

What I learned that day was incredible.  At first, there was learning how to be with others — in silence.  To feel their emotion, to hear their thoughts (even when they were saying nothing), to notice their way of being.  Then, there was learning to be with me — with all of me, nothing to take away from whatever was true for me in the moment.  And then, there was learning to be with the answers to my questions — because they were all there.  Going to the quiet place served to remind me that anything I wanted, anything that had me puzzled, whatever I was questioning — the answers really do lie within.

I share this with you today, because I’m aware of an uncertainty in my world, as well as in the world at large.  I woke up this morning wondering, and then remembering that it didn’t have to be complicated — that I could find what I sought within me.  What I know for sure is that this same learning holds true for you.  You need only go within, get comfortable with silence, give yourself time and space to get really quiet — and you will find what you’re looking for.  Everything will become clear.  And you’ll be able to move forward with certainty.  Which is a great feeling.

When You Can’t Read the Signs…

…feel them.  That’s right, instead of worrying about reading the signs that the universe is trying to send you, feel them in your being.  You are a powerful receptor and conveyor of information, particularly information from the universe.  I know from my own experience that every answer you seek to every question you have can be accessed in your body somewhere.

Play along with me for a moment.  Sit or stand with your feet firmly planted on the ground.  Close your eyes (okay, you’re going to have to read this paragraph in its entirety before you do the exercise!).  With your eyes closed, take 3 or 4 deep breaths.  With each exhale, feel any tension you’re holding or anxiety your feeling leave through your toes and dissolve into the ground beneath you.  Now take your right hand and put it over your heart, or your forehead or your stomach – wherever it is that you feel most connected to your power.  Now ask whatever question you’ve got on your mind.  Be still.  Pay attention to your body and feeeeel the answer.  Can you feel it?  I assert that you can.  The challenge now is for you to learn to trust it.

Whatever your question is/was you’ve now been given an answer.  What will happen if you follow your guidance?  So often, as human beings we rely only on what we “hear”; while there is nothing inherently wrong with hearing, what I want you to get is that there are other ways to access the answers you seek.  Utilizing all of your senses will allow you to source your answers quicker.

So go ahead and play with this notion of feeling.  Have some fun with it.  At the very least, it’ll lend some variety to your day.  And it may even open you up to having your questions answered more expediently.  Happy Friday to you!