Who’s Lovin’ YOU?

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day and the bigger part of me really does believe that this particular holiday is nothing more than a commercial attempt to guilt consumers into buying things as tokens and symbols of their love for one another. Now don’t get me wrong; I appreciate a nice gift from my sweetheart as anybody else; I enjoy thinking of creative gifts to give on my part, and I love the opportunity to enjoy romantic time together. All of these things seem to go hand-in-hand with Valentine’s Day. And, in the process, I think there are a number of aspects of love that get overlooked. There are different kinds of love that get sidestepped.

Regardless of how you choose to participate in Valentine’s Day – or even IF you choose to participate in the celebration – there is one particular “love” that I want you to consider for a bit. Self-love. How well are YOU loving YOU? You and I both know that you’ve got a lot of love to go around. Generally you spread that love between your partner, your family, your children, your friends, your neighbors, your colleagues. Love gets expressed in so many different ways and my guess is that for the most part the expression is generally directed outward, as in away from you. What is that about?

You see, one of the things I’ve come to know for sure is that until and unless you love yourself you simply cannot love another as meaningfully as you might like. This seems a little contradictory to our typical teachings about love, I know. You’re taught to think about others first, to not be selfish. And yet, what I’ve discovered is that there’s a fine line between selfishness and self-love. Admittedly, the former prevents you from loving another fully. The latter, however, actually facilitates the process like you wouldn’t believe. When you can love yourself fully – when you can accept yourself, warts and all – you can do the same for another. In other words, the degree to which you love yourself will ultimately determine how well you love another.

Bottom-line: Nobody deserves to be loved more than you. The thing is, it’s time for you to stop waiting for others to love you, and to start loving yourself. So on this Valentine’s Day, even as you think about how you will celebrate your love for another, give equal consideration to how you will celebrate your love for you. It’s time to understand that loving yourself is the ticket to a lifetime of love and happiness.