The Power of a Listening Ear

So I’m going to point out something that I’m sure you already know.  That being said, it’s such an obvious fact that the implications may escape your notice as you move through your days.  Here’s the thing:  having people who will listen to you — not necessarily agree, mind you, but listen, hear and allow you space to be real — is essential to your ability to live fully and completely.  In other words, true friends are priceless.

This morning I woke up — can you actually wake up if you never really slept all night? — feeling less than ideal.  It happens.  I’ve had a lot on my mind for a LONG time, I’ve been working at implementing new ideas, I’ve been in the throes of back-to-school preparations, my mind has been racing more often than not — you get the idea.  And, with all this busy-ness, there hasn’t been a whole lot of time for conversation.

Don’t get me wrong; I’ve gotten together with friends, had outings and excursions with my family, had a lot of laughs.  But what I realized today is that I haven’t had any of those deep, rich, no-hold-barred-because-you-know-there-will-be-no-judgement kind of conversations.  Let’s face it; there are only certain people that you can have these conversations with, and when life gets busy, what I’m realizing, is you’ve got to be really deliberate about staying connected to those folks.  Otherwise, before you know it, you’re struggling to stay above water.

The advantage of these sorts of relationships — the ones in which your friend listens without judgement or suggestion, hears what you’re saying, acknowledges the very real feelings you’re having without trying to fix or agree or disagree — is a powerful sort of catharsis.  I know this because I was able to have such a conversation this morning and became very aware of the shift in my energy.  Yes, I’m still tired.  And, my head is clearer, my shoulders feel lighter, I feel connected.  This shift is a neat one to experience.  One that I would highly endorse.

Bottom-line:  when you’re feeling off, in any way, no matter how much you might want to retreat into your cave and reflect (which can be effective from time to time, I will admit it) — call a really good friend.  Somebody who will really hear you, make the time for you, listen to you and then allow you to move on in whatever way feels right.  And if you don’t have a person like this in your life, find one.  He or she will be absolutely irreplaceable.