The Need for Compassion…Again
I’ve written about the need for compassion before. My sense is that it bears repeating. Why? Because I look around the world, in sort of an everyday context, and I’ve got to wonder, “where the heck did it go?” (As in, “where the heck did compassion go, not “the world”!)
Saturday morning found me at the hospital with my parents. My dad’s got a WICKED cough, and what appeared to be (and has since been confirmed as) the flu. The wait time to see the doctor was painfully long — we were there for 7 hours total — and I wasn’t the one trying to get comfortable. Between lengthy coughing fits, body aches, unbelievable fatigue from lack of sleep, all my dad wanted — and needed — was for someone to give him a place to lie down, show some understanding and hear him out. Wasn’t happening.
For whatever reason, the triage nurse just didn’t have the time to listen to his complaints. Her job, as far as I could tell, was to get him registered, mark down his symptoms, then keep him waiting until a bed was available. I get it. And yet, there was something about watching a waiting room full of ill people — many of whom were seniors — just waiting to be taken care of that was heart-wrenching. Especially when they would approach the window to speak with the nurse, sometimes ask a question or register worsening symptoms, only to be left speaking to the side of her head while she typed away at her computer in silence. Really? I’ve got to wonder, what would it have taken for her to at least say, “I understand” or, “I know you’re uncomfortable” — something that expressed compassion. I mean, even if she had turned to her colleague and rolled her eyes after my dad or others had lodged complaints or expressed concern and turned away, at least my dad and his waiting room compadres would have FELT heard.
I know from my own experience on both sides of this fence, when someone is sick, all they want is to be made comfortable. And when you’re the one dealing with the person who’s sick, all you want is for them to understand that there’s only so much you can do. And yet, my personal sense is that the person who’s not sick is in the better position to express compassion, at least for a bit. So here’s my question: what does it take to express compassion?
I would love to hear your thoughts. Send me a quick email or post your thoughts on this site. This one’s definitely got me curious.
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