Just Because You Say It’s So, Doesn’t Mean It Is

Two of the best gifts in my life are my children.  Everyday, I have the opportunity to be with them in all sorts of scenarios, witness their growth, help them solve problems, teach them, learn from them — it’s all awesome, amazing stuff.  Yes, even the challenging stuff (and there are a few of those moments each day too!)

One of the more recent discussions that has arisen in our house is around “fact” vs. “opinion”.  In school, both of my children are being provided with opportunity to learn about these concepts, and they’re having fun writing essays, persuasive letters, you get the idea.  And the learning carries over into the home environment.  We’ve had lots of opportunity to explore what’s an actual fact and what’s not.

You see, one of the things that my oldest in particular grapples with, is passing off an opinion as fact.  And he’s not the only one.  I see and hear all sorts of people everyday make statements of opinion, expressing them as if they are indisputable fact.  Things like, “those cookies suck”, “going to the gym is the best way to exercise”, or “you’ve got to go to see that movie — it’s the best”.  Each of these ideas, the way they are presented, implies a fact.  In actuality, however, they are statements of opinion.  I might think the cookies are awful, you might love the gingery snap.  You might love the gym, I might experience it as torture.  My friend might be a big fan of comedy films, whereas I prefer drama.  Any time a statement begins with “This is…”  or “this was…” or the like, it’s being presented as fact.  And trying to pass off opinion as fact, is a set-up for disagreement and even hurt feelings, every single time.

Don’t get me wrong; there are definitely indisputable facts in the world.  For example, “2 + 2 = 4″ is a fact.  “Canada is a country” is a fact.  “I am just over 5 feet tall” is a fact.  There is no need to even try and dispute these — they are absolute.  Whether or not a city is beautiful, a food is delicious, or a person is nice, however, can often be debated.  Each of these always boils down to an individual’s experience.  And so statements around these topics are better off made from the place of “In my opinion…”, “My experience of….”, or “I think…”.  This leaves room for someone else to have a different experience, and not question why.

Bottom-line:  when you make a statement, do a quick check and verify whether it’s fact or opinion first.  Passing off opinion as fact really doesn’t serve anyone or anything, in my opinion.  It’s simply a surefire way to set up a disagreement that doesn’t have to exist.  That’s where I’m at today.