Yes, Strong Leaders Can Be Vulnerable

For some reason, the issue of vulnerability is on my mind today.  Not sure why.  And not sure it really matters.  I’m just aware that I’ve been contemplating vulnerability for a bit today, wondering what it means, and what role it has in the realm of effective leadership.

You see, one of the things I witness fairly regularly in my work (given that I work with women leaders) is a trend towards “being strong” — or at least acting strong — in the face of whatever comes your way.  There seems to be an idea floating around that effective leaders are strong.  Period.  And for the most part, I can totally buy into this idea.  Effective leaders ARE strong.  That being said, I don’t believe that this strength needs to come at the expense of vulnerability.

When I think of effective leaders, leaders who get the job done, who command respect and draw people into their cause, there’s definitely a confidence and conviction that can be interpreted as strength.  I do believe, however, that these same strong leaders — the effective ones — also know how to allow their vulnerability to come through.  Vulnerability takes the form of admitting to mistakes, acknowledging that you don’t have all the answers, being willing to rely on your team, surrounding yourself with people who have capabilities which you don’t.  And sometimes, vulnerability means allowing your emotions to be visible to the outside world, including sadness and fear.

Why do I feel the need to write about this today?  Because I think the notion that vulnerability is contrary to effective leadership is false.  Moreover, I think this mistaken notion sets otherwise effective and powerful leaders up for failure.  Not just one-time, oops-I-made-a-mistake failure, but gone-for-all-time failure — the kind of failure whereby leaders lose followers and therefore lose their capacity to lead.  My sense is that until and unless an otherwise effective leader is willing to be vulnerable — to let his or her supposed “weakness” come through from time to time, people will actually find other leaders.

While having a strong, heroic, invincible leader works for a time, at some point people want to see your humanity.  In other words, effective leaders have got to be willing to let their emotions come forward, their mistakes be made known, so that they can then be seen to rise above that.

Bottom-line:  to be a truly effective leader, you’ve got to be a whole human package.  Strength is good.  Vulnerability is good.  And both together is great.  Vulnerable strength, and strong vulnerability — I think these are at least two of the characteristics of effective leaders.