I Know You’re Right…And What If You’re Wrong?

This is a question that I love to ask.  Whether I’m working with a client or just evaluating a personal circumstance, exploring the possibility of being wrong can offer incredible insight in a situation.  All of a sudden, what seemed so cut-and-dried 30 seconds ago, becomes less so as you entertain a new vantage point.  Believe it or not, possibilities open up, friction fizzles away and tension disappears when you can be with the idea — or at least hold it as a possibility for a few seconds — that you might actually be wrong.

Asking yourself if you might be wrong is another strategy for “walking a mile in another person’s shoes” or finding another perspective.  You see, there’s a teaching I once heard which says that there are always at least three sides to a story:  yours, mine and the truth.  The funny thing is that both you and I believe that we’re privy to the truth, to the “rightness” of the story.  The challenge of course is that any time you find yourself entrenched in an “I’m right on this issue” perspective, you actually close yourself from being truly engaged with whatever’s going on.  You’re so busy “being right”, that you start to alienate the world around you, and truly miss the point.

The key to holding the question of right and wrong is to do so with a sense of detachment, a letting go of judgment.  Admittedly, when you’re in the land of “right and wrong” letting go of judgment seems counter-intuitive.  And yet, if you can actually find a way to hold right and wrong lightly, without making either position “good” or “bad”, you can start to be with the world in a more constructive way.  You can actually move through conflict  and disagreement with a sense of ease, knowing that whether or not you’re right or wrong is less a matter of judgment, and more an opportunity for self-growth and evolution.

Bottom-line:  let go of believing that you’re absolutely right, and entertain the possibility that you might be wrong.  Don’t wait for everyone else to be wrong — believe that you might be wrong too, and watch the truth reveal itself in a new light.  My guess is you’ll be pleasantly surprised.