YLYW Podcast 16: Using Reflections Effectively in YLYW

Description: Ever find yourself saying “I don’t have a choice?” What gets shut down in your life when you operate from this frame? How can opening up choices serve you? What would be possible if you operated from the premise that you ALWAYS have a choice? Listen in on this podcast and find out how embracing choice can fill your life with a greater sense of EASE.

Summary: Learning How, When, Why and Where to reflect can be valuable when it comes to living life on your terms.  This segment explores the power of reflection and offers some concrete structures to support the process.

  YLYW 16: Effective Reflections Worksheet (57.7 KiB, 0 hits)
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The Holiday Dance: Hustle, Waltz or Quickstep?

While it’s accurate to say that the holidays are fast approaching, it’s equally accurate to say that the “holiday season” is upon us.  That’s right, it is here and we as a collective are smack dab in the middle of all that it entails.

For some, the arrival of the holiday season brings with it a whack of excitement, anticipation and joy.  For others, it’s a sure-fire source of angst and turmoil — blood pressure levels start skyrocketing and muscles take on a whole new level of tension.  Using a dance metaphor (because I love metaphors and I love dancing) I feel that I can confidently say the holiday season has different people dancing to different tunes, and whether or not they include christmas carols is absolutely a moot point.

You see, the holiday season brings with it a very specific rhythm, a beat that is different from any other time of the year.  What’s interesting is that the beat is entirely open to interpretation.  As a result, while some hear soft, fluid melody, others hear syncopation and a backbeat.  Nothing wrong with either — and it does mean that people are going to dance through the season differently.  After all, it’s hard to do a jitterbug, if the music you’re hearing is a paso doble (can you tell I’m a Dancing With the Stars fan?).  The beauty is that you can actually determine what beat you’ll hear, what dance you’d like to do.  All that’s required is a conscious choice on your part.

So, let me ask you:  when you think of the holidays, is it your preference to dance your way through doing a waltz?  Or are you more of a quickstepper?  Maybe a jive?  Know that there is nothing wrong with any of the dance styles you might choose.  The only challenge is that if you don’t consciously determine what holiday dance you’re doing, you will end up being dragged onto the dance floor to engage in some sort of movement that you’d rather not do.

Bottom-line:  decide here and now, the essence of the holiday dance you’d like to create.  Once you’ve made your decision, hold this in your consciousness and make every experience align with your choice.  That way, once the holidays are over, you’ll be able to say with confidence and recall with certainty that you had the holiday dance you wanted.

In The Face of Cynicism

Who knew that cynicism could start so early.  How early?  Well, apparently 9-year olds can be cynical.  I had no idea.

If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you’re probably aware that one of my intentions as a parent is to teach my children, and model for my children, the creative power that we each have, the power that is rooted in intention and deliberate, conscious choice.  With this in mind, one of our morning rituals before my kiddies head off to school is for us each to state one goal for the day, and what kind of day we’re striving to create.  So, oftentimes, my children will head out the door after having stated confidently something like, “My goal is to have a fun day and to do well in my math quiz.”  At the end of the day, or over dinner, we have an opportunity to check in on these goals and intentions.  As I said, for me it’s about having them learn and understand that they do have some say in how things go.

Well, this morning we had two of my daughter’s friends with us for the before-school time (mom had to go to work early, and I was happy to help out with childcare).  When I asked my daughter what kind of day she was going to have, I distinctly heard her 9-year old friend say, with a tone of utter disdain, “What kind of day is she going to have?  How can she know?  I don’t know what kind of day I’m going to have until it’s done?!!!!”  Now, while I understand that for some this whole concept is novel — I just wasn’t prepared for the cynicism.  That very cynicism is what gets in the way of people claiming their co-creative power and potential.

So, knowing that this cynicism starts early, I am increasing my commitment to modeling and teaching these strategies to my children.  And, I want to challenge you to do the same.  I firmly believe that intentionally deciding what kind of day you’re going to have serves better than the conventional “wait-and-see” paradigm.  It all begins by answering this question:  What kind of day are YOU going to have?

A Way to Wrap Up 2009

I’ve just had an idea, so figured I’d blog about it.  I’m always challenging myself to break out of the norm, find new ways to be with the world and myself.  This time of year is generally seen as a time of celebration and reflection, simultaneously.  The celebration, of course, is all about thanksgiving, sharing and joyful connection in most traditions.  And the reflection, at least for me, is about looking at this year that’s passed, taking stock, and then channeling those reflections into intentions and goals for the year ahead.  With this in mind, I conjured my new idea

Look back on the past 12 months and fill in the following blanks:

• I am _______________
• I’ve done _____________
• My favourite moment was ________________
• I laughed the most when _______________
• I know now that _________________
• I’m blessed because __________________
• I’m thankful for _____________________
• I’m surrounded by ______________________
• I discovered that _____________________
• I know I can do __________________

It occurs to me that a list such as this will allow me to take stock.  But what I really like about it is that once I’ve filled in the blanks for 2009, I can rewrite the list, pretend I’m looking back on 2010 once it’s passed, and fill in the blanks AGAIN.  In other words, with one simple activity, I can reflect and give thanks AND set my goals and intentions for the new year.  In the latter context, my blanks will be filled in based on the answers I have to this question:  “What do I want to be able to say come December 31, 2010?”

I don’t know, for me, it’s all about fun, new, fresh and intriguing. These questions seem to capture some of these qualities for me.  I believe they’ll work for you too.

YLYW Podcast 15: Authentic Celebration

Description: Ever find yourself saying “I don’t have a choice?” What gets shut down in your life when you operate from this frame? How can opening up choices serve you? What would be possible if you operated from the premise that you ALWAYS have a choice? Listen in on this podcast and find out how embracing choice can fill your life with a greater sense of EASE.

Summary: The 15th segment to the Your Life, Your Way series of podcasts: Podcast 15 — Authentic Celebration.