What Side of the Fence Are You On?

You know, there’s a lot that depends on your answer to the title question.  To begin with, your perspective can be drastically different from one side to the other.  And as a result, the choices that seem “right” can change as well.  What seems like the right choice on one side, can seem totally wrong on the other.

Why am I bringing this up?  Because I think it can be way too easy to stand in judgement and assume that my perspective in any given moment is the absolute right one.  And while it might be right for me, given my circumstances and posture at the time, it doesn’t mean that it’s aboslutely right for anyone, anywhere at any given time.

Embracing the idea that perspective counts for a lot when it comes to decision-making, can really liberate  your thinking.  It opens up possibilities, not the least of which is the possibility that you and I can view things differently and it’s okay.  We can choose different things and it’s okay.  Heck, we can even choose to disagree, and IT”S OKAY!

Bottom-line:  know which side of the fence you’re on, understand that your perspectives and ideas come from this side, and allow others to enjoy their side.  And be open to the idea that you can change sides whenever you want.  You’d be amazed at what becomes possible.

Powerful Connections

It’s funny how I get reminded of things.  Years ago I had an experience of feeling anxious, without knowing what the anxiety was about.  I remember trying desperately to “figure it out” — was it work?  Was I sick?  Was something bugging me on a subconscious level?  For the life of me I couldn’t understand the angst that was persisting.  And the more I tried to figure it out, the more anxious I got – go figure!

Then I had a colleague — a wise individual he was! — remind me that, like it or not, human beings are all connected on a cellular level.  And even more important than that, we as human beings are connected on an energetic level to all things on the planet.  So what?  So that means that sometimes the “angst” I’m feeling isn’t about me at all — it’s about what’s going on “out there”.  Given the nature of human experience is to operate from ego, this idea is an easy thing to forget.

The mantra I came up with at the time of this initial learning/revelation was “let it be”.  Just let the angst be what it is.  Don’t try to figure it out, solve it or dispel it.  Just flow with it.  And what I want to add to the mantra now is the idea of really feeling into the connection, even as I let the angst be what it is.  Because these connections do serve.  And when you can feel the power of the connection, it’s pretty engaging and neat stuff.  So that’s my musing for today.  It’s good to feel connected — deeply and powerfully connected.  When you allow yourself to feel into the connections, the energy can (and does) shift.  Awesome stuff I tell you!

Focus Outward

Those of you who’ve been following along know that my last few posts have been about finding ways to “move past” something, anything really.  Yesterday, in an effort to reconnect with some of my learnings from last year (because they were good and I know that!) I chose to reread segments of my journal.  More specifically I read segments from my “leadership” journal, “leadership” being the 10-month course I invested time and energy in.  Here’s the reminder I got out of that:  when you’re feeling stuck, take your focus off of yourself and create from what’s out there.  In other words, take your focus outward.

AS often happens for me, I was moved.  Because I could totally resonate with the energetic veracity of that instruction.  I know that what keeps me stuck is keeping my focus on me, my fears, my angst, my distress whatever it may be related to.  So when I put my focus outward, my attention gets drawn away from those things, and gets put instead on the things that matter most: what’s needed out there and how I might meet that need.

Don’t get me wrong; this isn’t about ignoring personal needs at all.  Indeed noticing your own needs and meeting those is vital.  But when you’re so focused internally that you can’t move, it really is time to put your focus elsewhere.  And what I know for sure is that whenever I can put my attention outward, particularly when I can do it from the perspective of service, I will get unstuck.  Which is a good thing.

There’s Something in the Air

You know, for the last few days there’s been something in the air.  I wasn’t really aware of it at first; I made the assumption that what I was feeling was something inside ME.  But then I started looking around, talking to others, and realized this is not just ME.  This is a lot of people.  And what I know from experience is that when a  lot of people seem to be having the same feelings going on, it’s the energetic field that’s got something going on.  Here’s what I’ve come to believe about the energy of the world right now:  the voice of fear is drowning out the voices of trust, reason and love.

“So what?”, you might ask.  Well, here’s what.  When the voice of fear is as loud as it currently is, there’s a heaviness of heart that’s evident all around us.  And that heaviness has people making snap decisions — decisions based in fear — which is rarely a good basis for a decision.

So what’s the solution?  You play a game.  The waiting game, more specifically.  That’s right, you sit down, breathe, and wait things out.  Let yourself get really still and quiet.  Quiet your mind, quiet your tongue.  Let the voice of fear shout itself out (you don’t have to listen to it) until it’s hoarse and then allow the other voices — the voices of trust, reason and love to make themselves heard. You’ll know that you’re hearing those voices when the heaviness in your heart lifts.  And then, with a lighter heart, you can make your choices.  Ironically, they may be the same choices as you were feeling inclined towards when listening to the voice of fear.  When those choices are made in a spirit of trust, reason and love, howver, they’re more likely to garner results that serve.  Which is a good thing.

Breathe, Breathe, Breathe…

Wow.  What a day thus far.  From the get-go I’ve been presented with block after block after block, challenge after challenge.  And not of the “wow, this is nice and challenging” variety.  More of the “what the heck kind of challenge is this?” kind of challenging.  The result?  The voice of fear has gotten louder, overpowering the voices of reason and trust.  Not a pretty sight (or sound, I might add).  And while I’m aware of the loudness, and of my ability to choose in the face of the cacaphony of fear, I actually got to the point today where I almost forgot how to breathe.  Fascinating, eh?

Fortunately, I’ve got a great network of friends.  I can lean into them and their wisdom and strength when I need it.  It’s a reminder to me that I’m never alone, even when I think I am.  The universe has really “got my back”.  Reassuring.  And knowing that the universe is in my corner, no matter how loudly fear might try to tell me otherwise,  allows me a moment, no matter how brief, in which to remember that breathing is a natural way to calm down.  And so that’s what I’ve done today, a whole lot of breathing.  Deep inhales, complete exhales.  And with each breath I’ve felt my shoulders release, my stress ebb away.  It’s all good.  And for that I am grateful, and gratitude is yet another way to allow the voice of reason to grow.

And here’s another thing that’s good:  the day’s not done.  So, I can keep breathing, releasing and allowing the voice of reason to override the voice of fear.  Which it will (and is doing).  And then, glory-be, tomorrow is yet another day.  So, I’ll just breathe.  And breathe some more.  And remind myself that fear is present for everybody, myself included.  And this too shall pass.

Looking for a Book to Read?

The weekend is upon us; mine starts today as I embark on a whirlwind “surprise trip” with my family to end March Break.  It’s a surprise in that the kidlets don’t know the plan, not even where we’re going.  Should be fun!  And when the weekend approaches, roadtrip or not, I love to settle in with a good book — and to hear about good books from others.  So this is a different entry.  I’m part of a group called Authors Promoting Authors — a pay-it-forward kind of set-up where we each promo another’s work, knowing that it’s a great vehicle to spread the word re. whatever we’re up to.  So here’s the title that I’m telling you about — it sounds “intriguing” and a good read to say the least:

“Soul Stealer” by Kimberley Troutte

Listen to this juicy description and see if it doesn’t leave you wanting more:

When Death falls in love with a saint, there’s holy hell to pay.

Sara Lane expects to die young, but when the time comes, she’s not ready. She needs two more weeks to finish a homeless shelter before winter sets in and people die on the streets. Who does a girl have to sleep with to live a few extra days?

How about the sexiest, most dangerous of all bad boys—Death himself?

Cain’s job as a designated death dealer is clear. Kill and move on. Don’t get attached. Don’t feel. But when Sara pleads to cut a deal for more time, Cain is tempted by an unexpected craving for this beautiful, courageous woman. As their lips meet, her life force shakes him to his bones, seals the bargain—and breaks all the rules.

Keeping Sara alive is a dangerous proposition. The Powers That Be are furious and unleash bloodthirsty demons to steal Sara’s soul from Death—the one man who’s hell-bent on saving her life.

Warning: This book contains the sexiest of all bad boys, a woman desperate to get what she wants, deadly soul-sucking demons, surprise visits by Biblical characters, frog grenades, very bad dogs, sacrifice, redemption and eternal love.

I don’t know …it’s definitely got me intrigued.  I’ll be adding this to my list of “to-reads” and if you get to it before me, I’d love to hear your thoughts.  Happy Reading!  And happy weekend!

Gotta Love the Obstacles (Hard as it might seem)

So, I’m sitting here, seemingly hitting obstacle, after obstacle, after obstacle as I endeavour to create a trial video “shout-out” for an event this weekend.  My co-author and I were suppossed to be in attendance, however, circumstances having evolved in a certain way, neither of us is able to be physically present.  So what could be better than a video recording that can be shown — feels like the next best thing, eh?  For some reason, however, while I can definitely record it, I can’t burn it to a CD.  Or to be clear, it seems to be burning, but then it won’t play on any device I’ve got.  (I’m talking about computers, DVD players, or anything!).

So needless to say, I’m getting close to the snapping point.  Luckily, I have enough strategies in my back-pocket to be able to breathe and stay grounded.  And then I came across this faulous quote that essentially says that obstacles increase as you get closer to your goal.  And I have to chuckle, because that has often been my experience over they years.  Would be really easy to give up in the face of this fact.  And I won’t.  Instead, I’ll see the obstacles for what they are, and hold the question, “now what?” until I find the way.  ‘Cuz I know there’s a way.  And if it doesn’t reveal itself to me before the end of the evening (which is my deadline, as I’ve got to get prepared for a surprise-filled weekend with my family), then I guess it wasn’t meant to be.

And I’m not giving up yet.  Love the Obstacles, stay open to options, and let it all be okay.  That’s what I’m going to do.  There; I feel better now.

Contrast

One of the people I absolutely love in this world are my elders and mentors, Henry & Karen  Kimsey House.  These brilliant individuals have taught me so much, reminded me of so much, modeled so much.  And I continue to learn just from bearing witness to the way they show up in the world, whether I’m in actual conversation or presence with them, or not.  It’s awesome.

Yesterday, when I was reading Henry’s blog, I was reminded of the idea of contrast in life, and the necessity of such.  Henry talked about this specifically as it relates to the peaks and valleys — or “dips” — of life.  The former often creates that feeling of being on a high, absolutely loving life.  the latter often leaves me  feeling yucky (that’s the scientific term you know!).  And yet, without “the dips”, the peaks can’t exist.  It’s the irony of the whole thing.  While the dips are things that I tell myself I’d rather avoid, the fact is that the peaks wouldn’t feel “peak-ish” at all, without the dips to provide the contrast.

So, what’s my point?  Just a reminder to “be” in the place of the dip, to savour it as much as the peak, knowing that neither can exist without the other.  To paraphrase Eckart Tolle, the saying “this too shall pass” applies to everything — the good, the not-so-good, and everything in between.  It all exists to provide richness, flavour and contrast to life.  Without sadness you can’t know joy, without illness you can’t know health, without enmity you can’t know friendship.

And when I say you can’t know, I mean it in the sense of truly knowing.  You might understand on some level that you’re happy.  But you won’tbe able to appreciate it fully without having had the experience of some degree of sadness.  Who knew?

Here’s the other thing that Henry talked about that really resonated for me:  the dip is not the place for decision-making.  Instead it’s the place for composting (Henry’s word, which I interpret as settling, being, processing).  When you’re in the dip, any decisions you make will be tainted.  There won’t be a clear thought-process to rely upon.  So, I say save decisions for the plateau, that place between the dip and the peak.  That space where you’re most rationale and grounded.  And then, climb on.

Bottom-line:  let the contrast be okay; don’t wish it away.  Because it really does serve you.  All of it.

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Mind Over Matter

So, as of this moment, I haven’t yet even titled this post.  I typically enter a title first, and then write the article that follows.  Today, however, I have a myriad of ideas flowing.  So I figure I’ll just start with those and see what words of wisdom get shared.  Bear with me, won’t you?

One of this things I’m very aware of is the pending arrival of spring.  Technically, it’s less than a week away.  In terms of the actual experience of spring — the warming of the air, the greeming of the landscape, the blooming of hyacinths and daffodils — I suspect I may have to wait a little longer.  Which brings me, I think, to the main thrust of today’s post.  Do I actually need the trappings of the season to feel the season?  Or can I have the experience of the season even without the externals?  I mean there are certainly “Christmas in July” celebrations — and theme parties which endeavor to bring the experience of different cultures without having to travel.  Granted it’s not quite “the real thing” — but it still gives me a sense of what it might be like.  Right?

So, how does this relate to what’s going on for me — or for that matter, for you — right now?  I guess I’d invite you to ask, what are you WANTING to experience?  And once you’ve got that figured out, the next question is, how might you experience that RIGHT NOW?  What would it take to get you from the place of waiting to the place of experiencing?

So often, it’s easy to decide that we need to wait for something.  But what if you could actually have at least part of the thing right now?  How would you need to be in order to make this happen?  Something to explore I think.  And certainly, it’s something I’m going to explore.  It feels like another way to play the “mind over matter” game.  Which is always fun, I think…

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